Chocolate Cravings
by usagisnape
Summary: It's PMS time at Hogwarts, where's the chocolate? Complete- Chapter 2 is thank you's
1. Default Chapter

Chocolate Craving

  
  


Just in case you are not up to date on your menstrual news they, being doctors and scientists, say that women who are in close proximity will find that their menstrual cycles coincide. And we all know about the chocolate cravings (drool) chocolate.

  
  


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"Hermione ... Hermione!"

"WHAT!" Hermione turned on Harry who cowered in the seat away from the female hormones. Hermione sighed. "Sorry Harry, I'm going to go get some chocolate."

"Hey, take Ginny with you, she's in one of her depressions again."

"Shut-up Ron, you don't know anything about it!" Ginny started crying. "Men, I hate them, they don't know what we go through." Ginny was wailing by this time. Hermione went to her and put her arm around her and gave Ron a very Snape-ish look. Lavender and Parvati stood to go with Hermione and Ginny as well and they made their way to the Hospital wing. Unbeknownst to them, they were followed by cool blue eyes and a slightly evil laugh.

  
  


Madame Pomfrey came out from the supply room wringing her hands, she looked worriedly at the girls.

"It's gone." They stared at her with open mouths. "All of it is gone, I don't know what happened to it. It was here yesterday. Someone came in and asked for some, but it was a boy so I didn't give him any. I knew it was close to your times." She looked fearfully at the girls. A witches cycle was much stronger than a muggle womans, and hence their symptoms were stronger as well. This could turn ugly.

"It's alright Madame Pomfrey, maybe we have some stashed in the tower." Hermione led the girls out.

"Hermione, I don't have any or I would have eaten it before breakfast." Lavender looked at her fearless leader with pain in her eyes. The other girls chimed in with the same.

"I know girls, I know we don't have any, but there is no reason why we should upset Madame Pomfrey, it looked like she had plenty to take care of anyway."

"Hermione, I know I had some, but it was missing this morning as well." Parvati was trying to think of when she had eaten it. Hermione stopped.

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure I had some too, but when I opened my trunk it was gone."

"Me too." Ginny was on the verge of tears again.

"We'll go to Hufflepuff house, they are notoriously generous."

"Yeah, in more than one way." Lavender snickered. Hermione batted her arm.

"Not now, we need their help. This is not a time for house rivalries."

  
  


"Susan, you wouldn't happen to have any spare chocolate? Susan?" Susan was in her room digging through her trunk slinging things here and there while her roommates watched anxiously.

"It's not here, It's gone, it's all gone!" Susan swept her arm around the room and the girls noticed that every trunk was the same. 

"Let's go see my sister!" Parvati cried, "she has doctor prescribed chocolate because her menses are so bad." The Gryffindor and Hufflepuff girls ran following their head girl to the Ravenclaw entrance.

"Toblerone" she turned and looked at the other girls, "they changed it last night." Everyone let out a little giggle, with a password like that they had to be stocked.

Inside the common room found all the seventh year Ravenclaw girls huddled around a crying figure. Padma was curled up in a ball crying in pain from the cramps and depression overtaking her.

"Oh no," Parvati ran to her sister and gathered her into her arms. "She needs Chocolate Hermione, it's the only thing that helps. What are we going to do?"

"There's still one place left." They all gasped at her presumptuousness. "Listen the bond of woman hood is stronger than house rivalries. They will understand what we are going through."

"Unless they are the ones who took it."

"No female would be that heinous." They made their way to the Slytherin common room but when the entered the great hall they met up with the seventh year girls led by Pansy Parkinson.

"Yours is gone too isn't it?" Hermione looked pleadingly at Pansy.

"Disappeared last night. Even the younger girls. I'm assuming there is none in the hospital wing."

"Nope, and none in the other houses." Hermione dropped the hatred act and talked to Pansy as if she was an old friend. "Pansy, what could have happened? It's all gone. These girls are going to start getting violent in the next hour. We already have one that's close to being comatose."

"Two." Pansy motioned to Millicent Bullstrode who was being supported by two other seventh years. Hermione shook her head. She could feel her anger welling up in her, her fists were clinched, she was gritting her teeth, it was taking all her self control to not punch the wall. Ginny fell to the floor sobbing hysterically. Just then someone came around the corner.

"I see Ginny still hasn't gotten her chocolate." The entire seventh year female class turned on Ron Weasley in one fluid movement. The din of voices carried throughout the hallway, some phrases were made out as being; PMS is real, I'll show you; let me show you how it feels to be a woman; think women have it easy, how about I make you one. And there were others, but the sound that punctuated everything else was the girlish screams that came from the mouth of Ron Weasley as he was being stripped, magically tarred and feathered and suspended upside down from the rafters. 

Snape came upon the scene beginning with what was sure to be a scathing remarking, something about hen-houses, but when the angry mob of women turned on him, he withdrew and confessed the identity of the perpetrator.

"Draco did it! I told him not too! Don't hurt me I can make chocolate! You need me!" At his words the mob stopped advancing. Hermione turned all her anger and hatred toward him and in a voice that would have scared Voldemort into hiding she said

"Make the chocolate, we will be back when we are done with the ferret." The mob turned and headed for the Slytherin common room. Snape looked up into the rafters at the chicken looking Weasley.

"When you get down, go to Madame Pomfrey, she has the remover for tar. Oh and ten points from Gryffindor for inciting a riot." He turned and made his way down to his dungeons.

  
  


Pansy said the password and they all stepped in side two at a time wands drawn, ready for battle. They could here the prat Draco bragging about his latest scheme to Crabbe and Goyle. Hermione and Pansy hushed everyone and listened.

"That old hag told me I couldn't have any chocolate, said it was for the girls. If I can't have it no one will. I disintegrated every piece of chocolate in the castle. They don't need it anyway. I think the whole PMS thing is just an excuse for them to eat chocolate and cry." Well that was it, the mob descended upon the threesome in a ferocity never seen before except maybe the goblin rebellions.

  
  


Snape was furiously mixing the remaining ingredients when he heard the girls coming into his classroom. They stood staring at him anxiously.

"Line up in order of who needs it the most. It is not going to be perfect, it's a rush job, don't expect perfection."

"Shut up and stir Snape, callow is not a good cologne." Hermione was impatiently tapping her foot, while the girls created a line putting Padma, Millicent and Ginny in the front. Hermione would wait until last. 

Snape finished and cast the cooling charms. The brown fluid snaked it's way out of the cauldrons and formed bars in mid-air. Snape cast an extra soothing charm over them to enhance their calming qualities. He, with the help of Hermione, began breaking off large hunks and handing them out. Each girl took hers greedily and went to a spot on the floor sat down and began eating. They room was littered with female bodies sprawled on the floor devouring chocolate bars. Soon there were contented sighs emitted from the lounging girls. Their hands and faces were covered in chocolate and they finally felt right for the first time. Each of them were so overjoyed that they each gave Snape a kiss on the cheek when they were through eating and on their way out. As Snape gave the last piece of chocolate out his face was covered in chocolate as well. Then he realized that Hermione had not gotten any. She looked at him expectantly and when he looked somewhat frightened she knew there wasn't any more. She looked at Lavender who had the last piece and was eating hers as she walked out the door. Hermione stopped her and she gave Hermione her last small piece and then Parvati followed suit and kissed Snape on the cheek and left.

"That wasn't enough." Hermione looked up at Snape expectantly who had pulled out a handkerchief to wipe off his face. She stopped his hand stood up on tip-toe and began slowly licking his face un til all the excess chocolate was gone.

"Better?" He asked her with the usual sarcasm in his voice, but there was something else underneath. Hermione stared at him with a new found interest.

"Did you want a taste?" She closed the distance between them again and slowly licked his lips. He responded by opening his mouth ever so slightly and Hermione took advantage of it and pushed her tongue into his mouth. He tasted the chocolate on her tongue before pulling away and looking into her eyes, and she realized at that moment what she had seen under the sarcasm, lust. "You know I hear that there is another good cure for PMS."

"What's that?"

"Sex." Snape stared at her for a moment and then decided it was in his best interest to comply, 'I mean, who knows what might happen if I tell her no.' He swooped her up into his arms and carried her off to his chambers where there was a glorious view of the three full moons of Slytherin suspended in the quidditch goals and the low mournful cry from a magically castrated Malfoy.

  
  


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Hope you liked it. This was for the ladies, inspired by true life cravings.


	2. Thank you

I'm so glad that so many people liked my short story. I just reviewed someone the other day and said how we should do more of these. It seems like all we write anymore are the extra long ones. So here are my thanks

  
  


Pen-name- I'm amazed at how many girls are on theor menses right now (including the chocoholic right here. Maybe Snape fans share a cycle, too weird.

  
  


Duck()- thanks!

  
  


seanbs-gurl- we are all pigging out on our left over choco' read some of the other reviews, we seriously share cycle times.

  
  


MOi- you suck, how do you not have PMS? That's it! No more chocolate for you! ever! I get your share, oh and seanbs-gurl as well, because easter candy sucks.

  
  


Piggie- with a name like that you got's to love choco'

  
  


kes- it's nice to know I'm not the only person who reads these things while working. But my story is no handmaids tale (thank Merlin)

  
  


Corazan- man, can I have your dad. My dad eats my choco' I have to hide it, and he's diabetic, go figure. Oh and if you find a way to stock Snape, send me some please.

  
  


Marisa Raven- Most everyone has learned that about me, except my dad, see review answer above.

  
  


Atalaya- read the intro silly! I realize that the coinciding PMS stuff doesn't usually happen in such mass numbers, but who knows with witches right? Just follow the HP universe basic rule, if all else fails, blame it on magic.

  
  


SWKay- Men, they're so dense. This is usual where I start ranting about men, but not this time, I'll control myself.

  
  


Lorena Snape- your not alone sister, and personally, I think I would lick boobtuber puss off of Snape if I could just find him, Dammitt where is he? I don't suppose he would be hiding in my bed? Nope.

  
  


Sister Golden-hair Surprise- UMMM Chocolate, I think I need to go get some more.

  
  


Vicki- It's so nice to know that I am not the only person reading these stories that have children old enough to read, well not These stories, but the G rated ones, maybe PG. I feel for my dad though, I have two daughters plus me. That's a lot of PMS and Chocolate. I just realized that sounds absolutely bizarre, unless of course you read my other stories then you know about my situation. anyway, I'm rambling.

  
  


Thank all of you for the wonderful reviews. I'm not doing a sequel but I might do some more quickies. I think I'll call them Quickies with Snape, maybe. I don't know, maybe sexy Snape productions. We'll see. Save me some Chocolate! and Snape if you have any.


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